Too Messy to Blog

My house is too messy to blog. This is what I always think when I read other people's blogs. I get a feeling in my stomach as I see their beautiful, smiling children crafting their homemade crafts and eating healthy lunches. But what really bothers me is that in the background of the pictures, you catch glimpses of their perfectly decorated, not at all messy houses. In general, I can never post a picture of my kids because in the background there is usually mass chaos. I can just hear the reaction now: "Wow, those are cute kids, but look at that pile of dishes!"

"Let your cleaning go," well-meaning people tell me. "Your kids are only young once, who cares?"

The problem is, this has been a life-long issue for me. As a child and teenager, my room was always a mess. In college, I could only hop from spot to spot in my room. When I got married, I knew I should have a vision of myself as an impeccable homemaker vacuuming with an apron on. But, honestly, it was such an unattainable dream that I didn't even bother.

Here's the thing: I care what my house looks like. But more than that, I care what YOU think my house looks like. The Hubs and I have MASTERED the art of, "Oh no, there's someone in the driveway, let's completely clean our house in the next 15 seconds." It's uncanny how good we are at it. Now that we have kids (who happen to be girls), I can't help but feeling like I have built-in witnesses who in about 25 years will constantly remind me of how messy our house always was.

To be fair to myself (and because I love blaming things on my mom), this mania is somewhat genetic. Before her parents would come visit us once a year, we spent a week completely cleaning our house from top to bottom. I think it was my mom's goal to have NOTHING for my grandma to do when she came to visit, as she loved to find something to clean every time she visited. "She was just trying to be helpful," you might say. But so help me, she cleaned out our refrigerator trays, swept our driveway, and cleaned our vents. My grandma had a very dear friend, who also happened to be my grandpa's sister. They were best friends growing up. Every time my grandma talks about her, she says, "Doris sure couldn't keep a house." It's my greatest fear in life for my people to say of me, "Katie is a wonderful person, but she sure can't keep a house."

I can't help but think that there are more people like me out there. You would like to blog to document your life or your kids' life (one less thing for them to blame ME for, right? I can just hear it now: "Mom, why didn't you blog every detail of my life? Everyone else's moms blogged!") But you don't blog because you fear that people will look a little too closely at the background of your pictures and see your piles of laundry and dishes, or the stacks of mail you haven't gone through, or, heaven forbid, the floor underneath your 2 year old's dinner chair.

You are out there, right? Right??